guidelies for empathetic listening
be attentive.you will crwate a positive atmosphere through your nonverbal behavior ,for instance ,eye contact ,an open relaxed posture , a friendly facial expreeion and a pleasant tone of voice. when you are alert ,attentive and relaxed, the other person feels important and more secure .
be interested in the speaker's needs . remember listening at level 1 means you listen with understanding and mutual respect.
isten from a caring attitude .be a sounding board by allowing the speaker to bounce ideas and feelings off of you .don't ask a lot of questions right away .questions can often come across as if the person is being "grilled
act like a mirror .reflect back what you think the other person is feeling. summarize what the person said to make sure you understand what he's saying.
don't let the other pweson ''hook you ." this can happen when you get personally involved .getting personally involved in a problem usually results in anger and hurt feelings or motivates you to jump to conclusions and be judgmental.
use verbal cues .acknowledge the person's statement using brief expressions such as, "uh -hum''"i see ."or "interesting ." encourage the speaker to reveal more by saying"tell me about it." "let's discuss it ," or "i'd be interesten in what you have to say ."
following these guidelines will help you be a suvvessful listener .it's critical to create the babit of being a level 1 lisrener by applying these guidelines on a daily basis so that they are internalized as part of your listening behavior. you can do this by taking time each day to carry out these skills successfully in a specific situation .you willbe surprised at the results.

如何进行设身处地的聆听


要集中注意力.您可以通过语言之外的行动,例如眼神的交流,舒缓放松的坐姿,友善的面部表情和愉悦的声调来营造一种积极气氛.当您作出快速反应,集中注意力或显得放松时,对方就会感到他在您心目中很重要,从而更有安全感.

要对讲话人的需求表示出兴趣.切记倾听首先是意味着理解对方和互相尊重.

要以关爱的态度去倾听,允许对方倾诉观点和情感,以此和对方产生共鸣.不要急着问一大堆问题.如果对方感觉像在受审,那通常就真出问题了.应当象一面镜子一样,体现出你了解对方的感受.可以总结一下对方的话中之意,以确认你已明白他的意图.

不要和对方在一个问题上过多纠缠,当你本人过多介入这个话题时,就易发生这种情况.本人过多介入这个话题通常会导致恼怒和抵触的情绪,或促使您提早做出结论,显得主观武断.

要善用口语提示.可用"uh -hum'',"明白了"或"有意思" 等简明的口语来肯定对方的陈述.并用"请多告诉我一些","我们来讨论一下吧"或"我对你要说的很感兴趣"等句子来鼓励对方透露更多信息.

上述指南将有助于您成为一名成功的倾听者.若要养成好习惯,成为一名一流的倾听者,就要把这些原则应用到日常生活中去,使之潜移默化,成为良好倾听行为的一部分,这一点至关重要.您可以每天在特定场合花费时间练习这些技能,其成效定会令您惊叹.